“’Ere we go, ‘ere we go, ‘ere we go” (Or - things we are learning now that Dave has had to stop insulting the Prime Minister and reveal what Dave is really like.)

Do you remember the arrogant, smarmy, patronising way that Tory MP’s would speak to us when they hid behind Thatcher thinking she was invincible? Well: have you noticed that Cameron talks to us just like that too? Like the teacher the kids loathe and make fun of behind his back, mimicking his over emphasised hand gestures and his alien (to all but pals) accent.

You would think he would now welcome the chance to stop pretending to be important and become the “real thing” by handling a couple of recent controversies rising from his Patriotic, one Britain, party. You might expect him to have fully answered a couple of recent tricky questions, especially considering the way he has repeatedly wasted PM’s Question Time by making cheap jibes about the PM, and demanding on behalf of the people in the street, (who actually don’t give a toss about such trivialities), that the PM must answer ‘in person’ questions of great national importance about “issues” such as which way his handwriting slopes and whether he always remembers to say please and thank you to his secretary.

But no! Twice in a week he has said as little as possible in response to situations that offered him a chance to demonstrate how Patriotic and Egalitarian his leadership, and his party, will be if they win the election.

The first of these occurred two weeks ago when Nicholas Winterton, MP, made it very clear during a radio interview that he is not yet ready for the classless society Dave is inferring he will create. You’d have thought this was a situation just made for Cameron to show his mettle, but no, a mumbled response from Tory Central Office claiming the errant Lord was “out of touch” was all we got. Difficult for Dave though, because just a few days before he was busy claiming that you, and I, and, well, just about anybody who uses the internet is a lesser mortal than he and his chums.

It didn’t really surprise me. I can remember the deafening silence a few months ago when Dave’s old university chum Boris referred to the ‘ordinary’ people of London as “Hoi Polloi”.

Having missed his openings there you might have expected Dave to grasp with both hands another opportunity to demonstrate to the voter in the street just how patriotic he is. I am referring of course to the news that major Tory fund provider, Lord Ashcroft, had reneged on his agreement to become resident in the UK in exchange for his peerage. Dave could have taken the opportunity to tell us why avoiding payment of taxes, and using the profit to fund a political party, is different from fiddling expenses while working for a political party. He could also have told us why Ashcroft is saying he will move to this country if Dave’s party wins the election. I wonder if Dave has told him something that we, and his other pals, don’t know.

None of this really surprised me either. After all, Dave didn’t think twice about joining up with the power seeking Aussie, Rupert Murdoch, and, in this week of all weeks, the whole world is becoming aware of how Dave has planned to sell out the BBC to diminish the Beeb’s ability to reduce the profits of Murdoch’s Broadcasting and Newspaper Empire.

I guess we should all thank Dave for showing us in advance that if he wins we are due to return to the free market, anything for a profit, days of Thatcherism.